I've got a mind of metal and grinding gears...

Why can't i forget you?
Why can't i find myself far enough away from you, even after i've put millions of miles under the soles of my shoes?
Why can't i find it in myself to suck it up and realize that you may never come back?
Why can't i look anywhere but the back of my eyelids and not see you?
Why can't i seem to find enough alcohol in my system to make me to even begin to forget, even if i started to black out?
Why am i not even safe in my own dreams from you?
Why didn't i protect myself enough?
Why didn't this whole thing work?
Why do i suddenly want to call you?
Why did i almost text you earlier, even after i deleted your number (but somehow memorized it)?
Why can't i see why you're not the one anymore?

Why am i sitting here, half drunk, feeling so sorry for myself, wishing to God i still had you... when i know you aren't in love with me anymore... and why, God, did things have to change..........


~O~